I don't know about you, but I do a ton of lunch dates. No, not dates in the college-sense (ha), but appointments, or times where you are connecting with colleagues, friends, family, leaders, etc. We all have them. However, I would argue that we all do not use them to the fullest extent we could. So, I began to think, "Do I utilize 'business' lunches to the fullest extent?" Thus, I am going to write keying on "business" lunches if you will. Keep in mind, I am not claiming to have the last word on proper lunch meeting etiquette, but I involve myself in this activity several times a week now for 5 years, so I feel as though I have some pertinent insight to offer.
The initial pickup - I often like to drive so that I can ride with my appointment. This increases the time we have to connect.
The ordering - As much as possible, and especially if I set it up, I like to pay. I know, you are sitting there reading saying, "Man I gotta go to lunch with this guy!" But I have always found that the more generous you are, the more God works through you in general in life. Even during this process, I do two things. One, I continue to connect with my appointment. I am catching up on life, love, family, etc. Secondly, I always try to meet the person taking my order. This is my evangelistic side coming out in me, but I love to take this opportunity to share Christ as much as possible.
The food - I consider this to be the time that you actually are either waiting for your food or eating your lunch. Here, I often will transition from regular small talk to a lead-in question regarding the purpose of my lunch date (which by the way, my lunch appointments do have purpose!). Am I recruiting them as a leader, needing their mentoring in my life, etc.? Why did I want to do lunch? So this brings us to the purpose.
The Purpose - Why are you having lunch? I always like to have this clearly pictured in my mind's eye before I pick the person up. I even envision the possible outcome that I am hoping for before we get together. Am I looking for advice, direction, confrontation? I usually discuss following the eating of the food. Also, as a sidenote here, be aware of your surroundings. I just ran into a girl last night at the local mall who was working in a store where I bought a Christmas gift for my wife. She knew me, but I didn't know her. She even said she sat beside me in a booth in a local restaurant a few weeks ago! Ah! I began to recount my lunch appointment that day as much as possible to see if I had talked about any sensitive matters. She even said she listened to our conversation somewhat! All said, always be aware of your surroundings, and even your topics of discussion. You just never know who is listening.
The Drop-off - On the drive back to work, I try and utilize this time to do one of two things. I always try and encourage and uplift the person I am with. How can I encourage them? How can I thank them for their time? Secondly, I share a plan of action. When can we do this again? How can we put feet to what we discussed? etc.
I know this sounds crazy, but I do feel that the more purposeful you can be with the time you spend with others, the more poignant and lasting your friendships, ministry, and influence will be.
