Making the Most of Lunch Dates

I don't know about you, but I do a ton of lunch dates. No, not dates in the college-sense (ha), but appointments, or times where you are connecting with colleagues, friends, family, leaders, etc. We all have them. However, I would argue that we all do not use them to the fullest extent we could. So, I began to think, "Do I utilize 'business' lunches to the fullest extent?" Thus, I am going to write keying on "business" lunches if you will. Keep in mind, I am not claiming to have the last word on proper lunch meeting etiquette, but I involve myself in this activity several times a week now for 5 years, so I feel as though I have some pertinent insight to offer.
The initial pickup - I often like to drive so that I can ride with my appointment. This increases the time we have to connect.
The ordering - As much as possible, and especially if I set it up, I like to pay. I know, you are sitting there reading saying, "Man I gotta go to lunch with this guy!" But I have always found that the more generous you are, the more God works through you in general in life. Even during this process, I do two things. One, I continue to connect with my appointment. I am catching up on life, love, family, etc. Secondly, I always try to meet the person taking my order. This is my evangelistic side coming out in me, but I love to take this opportunity to share Christ as much as possible.
The food - I consider this to be the time that you actually are either waiting for your food or eating your lunch. Here, I often will transition from regular small talk to a lead-in question regarding the purpose of my lunch date (which by the way, my lunch appointments do have purpose!). Am I recruiting them as a leader, needing their mentoring in my life, etc.? Why did I want to do lunch? So this brings us to the purpose.
The Purpose - Why are you having lunch? I always like to have this clearly pictured in my mind's eye before I pick the person up. I even envision the possible outcome that I am hoping for before we get together. Am I looking for advice, direction, confrontation? I usually discuss following the eating of the food. Also, as a sidenote here, be aware of your surroundings. I just ran into a girl last night at the local mall who was working in a store where I bought a Christmas gift for my wife. She knew me, but I didn't know her. She even said she sat beside me in a booth in a local restaurant a few weeks ago! Ah! I began to recount my lunch appointment that day as much as possible to see if I had talked about any sensitive matters. She even said she listened to our conversation somewhat! All said, always be aware of your surroundings, and even your topics of discussion. You just never know who is listening.
The Drop-off - On the drive back to work, I try and utilize this time to do one of two things. I always try and encourage and uplift the person I am with. How can I encourage them? How can I thank them for their time? Secondly, I share a plan of action. When can we do this again? How can we put feet to what we discussed? etc.
I know this sounds crazy, but I do feel that the more purposeful you can be with the time you spend with others, the more poignant and lasting your friendships, ministry, and influence will be.

Risking it All

After watching my LSU Tigers defeat the the Florida Gators tonight, I realized again how no great feat is accomplished without great risk! LSU was 5 for 5 on fourth down attempts in the game, scoring touchdowns on two of those attempts. Sometimes you just gotta go for it! You have to lay it all on the line, for hopes of your desired outcome. So, more than answers, this raised some significant questions for me.

1. Do I lay it all on the line for my relationship with Christ to grow? I think of the Beattitudes and how Christ said, "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst..." Spiritual hunger is something I rarely hear a sermon preached on. Why is that? It is a topic I rarely hear others, and myself, talk about. Why is that? When it comes to spiritual growth, I know I give in too easy. If I am tired, I go to bed instead of going to the Word. If the time with God will take too long, I frequently will not do it.
2. Do I go for it on fourth down with my ministry? Do I try to reach others for Christ and and help my students grow and develop their spiritual hunger? How many creative, incarnational ideas am I developing and launching? Do I truly and honestly critique my own ministry for strengths and weaknesses?
3. What would life look like for me if I followed through and began to work on the questions in numbers 1 and 2 above? I feel as though my marriage might be different, my ministry, and my personal spiritual life.

May I be one who always goes for 1st down, even when it is fourth and inches.

Pics of My Beautiful Girl

Ok so since my wife does this all the time, I figured I would post a few. So here we go. Here are some recent pics of our beautiful girl, Halle Anne Bradford.

Fast Facts for Fresh...Men

Ok it is Freshmen Orientation Weekend here at IWU and Shan and I just hosted a small group of guys and girls in our home tonight. It brought back a ton of memories for me from my freshman year and the first weekend at school. I began to especially think of how myself and all my buddies were looking for Miss Right! Come on! You were too...admit it! So, with that in mind, here is my advice to all of you 18 year old men out there hoping to meet your match.
1. Listen - If you do nothing else, learn to listen. This is will take you further than you realize with members of the opposite sex. And I find that few guys, or anyone for that matter, really listens well. I think it's because it actually takes heart. You have to WANT to listen...and really care about what you are hearing.
2. Be genuine - I know this is supposed to be a no-brainer, but it isn't. Be who you are. If you don't like something, say so. If you do like it, say so. Don't say what you think the other wants to hear.
3. Be fun - No one wants to marry a stick in the mud. Get out there this weekend and go to the Island Party. Do the limbo, even if you bow out on the first round. Hey, at least you tried. You are showing that you can mix it up, even if you aren't the best mixer.
4. Be patient - Don't try to rush anything. Whether we are talking physically, spiritually, socially, whatever...rarely does anything worthwhile happen over night. Take your time. If you don't find your wife in the first weekend, don't give up! You have another four years in college, and well, in my case, another 9 years before you get married (I married 9 years after my freshman year in college).
5. Opposites attract, and marry - 95% of the successfully married couples that I know are some degree of opposite. I know of only one couple who are pretty much the same in their personality and married. Most married couples seem to compliment each other in their personality type. If one is extroverted, then the other is introverted. On the personality scale, they may not be polar opposites, but they are different. Thus, what am I saying? Well, if you love people and meeting new people and get energy from a crowd and from working a room of strangers, then you will probably be best matched with someone that gets energy from being alone or with one or two of their closest friends. This is just the way it works...for some reason. Think about it...it even kinda makes sense. And I think to a point, maybe God made it that way.
Ok I will continue these tips later...Do you have any that I should add?

The Roof that Was...

I really thought my summer would be full of pre-planning for my ministry year up and coming, fun times with friends and tons of golf. However, I decided to place a new roof on my house! Oh my goodness! Incredible how time consuming and hard it has been. But I have learned that, by one simple project, several things have happened that I have never dreamed.
1. People have served. On one evening, I had 7 people working on the roof. Some volunteer, some getting paid, all having fun. Pretty cool when people come together on a project like this.
2. Manual labor is ok for a time, but I would go hungry if I had to do it all day everyday. I am not lying to you when I say I hurt every night when I go to bed. I wake at 7am and start working at 7:30am. Then, I quit at 10pm, or like tonight, almost 11pm.
3. Appreciation...I must extend appreciation to Kyle Doyon, Jason Ewer, Bryan Purvis, David Mui, Jim Vermilya, Geoffrey Buck, Aaron Tomlin, and others who have come to lend a helping hand. Without them, I would still be stripping cedar shake.
4. I miss my wife and baby girl. Even though I am only outside, I miss them terribly when I am not around, especially now with the baby! What am I going to do when I return to work! Ah!!!
Well have you ever done any projects like this? What did you learn?

Post-Labor Lessons Dad Style

Wow! I cannot believe how much I really did not know about being a Dad. Here are some of the things I have learned in my short time of 9 days of Dad-hood.
1. Babies don't always cry right after birth. I wish someone had told me that. I told Shannon, "Look how beautiful she is." Then she retorted back, "Why isn't she crying?" I had to honestly answer, "I don't know." Finally, the doctor was able to get her crying, and she hasn't stopped since! Low and behold, babies don't always cry right away. Sometimes it takes the doctor a while to get the lungs going.
2. Breastfeeding is anything but easy. I just thought as soon as the baby was born, breastfeeding was second nature. However, it is quite the struggle for a few weeks. Only after a few days/week or 2, does it become easier.
3. Take time off. If at all possible, take time off, Dad, from your job for a week or so. This will only help you and your wife deal more appropriately with this unique time of transition in your life. I don't know what I would do right now if I did not have June and July off this summer. I am up late and in the wee hours of the morning trying to help Shannon out with the baby, changing diapers or just comforting my wife. There is no way I could be productive at my work if I were still working full time.
4. Pray Pray Pray. Take this time to truly draw close to God and pray for your spouse and child. It was extremely special for me as Dad to have numerous friends and family members pray for my daughter already. However, it is even more special to pray for your baby yourself, or with your spouse!
All said, I would not trade my daughter for the world. I cannot stop smiling nor can I quit looking at her. She is truly an amazing creation. Thank you God!

Going Home

We are so excited right now because the doctors just left and they said we could go home, without the Billy-Rueben (sp?) blanket! No more little gloworm! YAY! So the first reason to give thanks is that we are going home. We have been here since Sunday at 12:30pm! Ah! Shan is ready for a new environment, and I am ready for my own bed and not the roll-out chair bed in the hospital room here. Secondly, we are excited to be going home without the blanket. It wraps around her to give her artifical light 24/7 in order to help with her Jondis. Her Jondis score has come down from 15.3 to this morning it was 13.1! YAY! All said, we are simply excited to be heading home. Keep praying for Shan's recovery as she still walks around like a slow moving grandmother, shuffling everywhere. Hopefully, she can continue to improve everyday. Here are some pics of my parents and my sister Lisa with her, as well as a picture from this morning.

Still here!

Well today is Wednesday and we are still at the hospital. Halle is great, she's a little jaundiced, so they're watching that and still helping me feed her. I feel the best I've felt yet, so that is an answer to prayer! I have been up and around a lot. Halle had her first photo shoot with the photographer this morning. She was so cute- I swear she's the cutest baby!! She melts my heart. She is so cute with her eyes open, very alert and looking around. Brian is amazing with her. It's been so neat to see him step in and help and be eager to do the dad stuff. He has already changed many diapers and is very good at it. He is the best care taker ever! Here are some updated pics and you can go to www. mgh.net to see her professional pics under baby pics at the nursery link. She's so precious!

New News on Halle Anne

Here is the latest for ya'll...it has been going pretty well...everyone eventually left last night about 9pm and so for the first time, just the 3 Bradfords were together! Pretty cool...and a huge praise that my parents (Rev. C. V. and Dee Bradford) made it here yesterday at around 6pm! Impressive for a 900+ mile trip in less than 2 days...now, the challenge yesterday was trying to get her to breastfeed...I never dreamed it would be a challenge to start the baby eating in that way! Finally this morning it has started to come easier and Halle is taking to it a little better now...Keep praying for rest though as they wake Shan up every 2 hours or so to feed, thus keeping her quite tired.
Also, it has been such a blessing to have our church family here care for us...College Wesleyan has been so amazing at doing just that...loving on us!
Oh and I was able to sleep some last night here in the hospital room on a roll out single bed, so at least now we are coming to rest a little, which is a much needed change. Lastly, the nurse said the goal today is to get the magnesium drip, IV, and catheter out, so yay! Making Progress...but thanks again for praying! We will keep you all posted!

My Girl is Here!

Halle Anne Bradford entered the world today at 6:40am weighing in at 8lbs 6oz. and measuring almost 21 inches long with a 14 inch head! The head was the main reason she was delivered by C-Section after 16+ hours of labor with 2 hours of hard labor! Since I have only had 15 minutes sleep within the last 27 hours, I hope this post makes sense. I have never had so many emotions run through me in my life and been so frazzled. But all is well right now as I look out in our hospital room. 3 generations of girls are all sleeping...Grandmother Gervel, Mom Bradford, and 1 day old baby girl Bradford! Pretty Cool. Well here are the pics we have so far. Keep praying all goes well and my wife recovers from the surgery!

The Waiting Game

I hate just waiting! I want to know what is going to happen before it happens. But that is not the case when you are waiting for your wife to deliver your first child! We are sitting in Marion General Hospital right now and have been here since 1pm. We bolted out of church this morning right in the middle of Pastor's Steve message. Sorry Steve! Shan was having blurred vision and seeing spots, so we decided to head home. Pretty Crazy! We went home and called the doctor, and he said to come on to the hospital. While in a hospital room, we still thought we would be going home soon because she was just having a headache, dizzy, and blurry vision, thus just thinking her blood pressure was too high. Long story short, we are still here and it is midnight. Dr. Swan decided to induce her and thus broke her water at 2pm. She is about 6cm dialated right now, so we are just waiting for 10 cm. Anyway here are some pics of what we have now.

More Birthday Pics

Birthday Bash 2007

Here is the skinny on my 29th. We went to Logan's and ate dinner, then on to PinHeads Lanes in Noblesville, IN for bowling fun. John Freed was able to work it out so that we could get the amazing suite in the back. I would highly recommend this bowling suite if you ever get the chance. All said, it was a tremendously fun night. Here are all who attended.

Jason and Mischele Denniston

Mike and Kristen Hofer

Bob and Brenda Simpson

Tony Cole

Paul Cole

Kenny Wilson

John and Danielle Freed

Nate and Julie Lamb

Jason and Liz Ewer

Brian and Shannon Bradford

Bryan and Andi Purvis

Thanks everyone for an absolutely fun and enjoyable birthday celebration.

First Year Thoughts on Teaching College Courses

Ok so I know I have only taught 3 college courses, and those have been adjunct, but I do feel as though I have learned a ton from the 3 classes of New Testament Survey here at IWU. So, just finishing up my last few grades and fresh off my last semester, here are my lessons gleaned from the experience.

1. The Syllabus is King. I wish I knew this going into last semester. Students always use that as their guide, and profs use it as their leverage. If it ain't on there, you can't hold'em to it! (southern translation).
2. Don't Get Behind in Grading. Wow! How huge is this? I just finished my grading with about twelve hours to spare. I need to learn how to space out my assignments more so that all of them are not due the last week of the semester.
3. Be careful asking students for evaluations. You may just get what you asked for. Although most of my comments are positive, there are always those few that manage to toughen your skin, and hopefully not hurt your heart too much.
4. Plunder the Egyptians. I actually went and sat in on another professor's lecture and listened to her teach. This way, I learned a few new techniques and was able to implement them into my teaching style. It never hurts to learn from the best and then take what you learn and plug it in...I know my students appreciated it.
5. Beware of Technology. Always plan for the worst when it comes to technology. Most of the time it works, but when it doesn't, life can come to a standstill. Thus, I always had a plan B waiting in the ranks just in case for the second semester.
6. It is a new day. What do I mean by that? Well, now students are surfing the web in your class, thus they can check on the web and see if what you are teaching, explaining, etc. is actually true. Thus, you better have your subject matter down and understand it very well. Humorously, I asked for a definition of a difficult word, and within seconds, one of my more comical students gave me a textbook answer right from dictionary.com.

All said, I would not trade this last year for anything. I love the students and seeing them "get it." What else what you add, and thus make a number 7 or 8 in the list?

Fairness of Life

As many of you know, Josh Buck had a terrible swimming accident and lies now in the ICU in a Miami hospital. He is fighting to regain feeling in his upper and lower body, and if you do not know him, here is a quick run down. He is a fun, talented, and passionate man of God with a great family. Josh is a Wesleyan church planter in Grand Rapids, Michigan and gifted worship leader and networker. Tragically, around one and half years ago or so, he and his wife lost their infant child to a freak accident in her crib and now Josh may or may not walk again. Thus, this scenario is prompting this writing...Is Life really fair?
I have been struggling with this question a lot lately. How is it that a man like Josh has had so much bad happen to him lately. Granted, I am a pastor and know a lot of the answers that I should know, but I cannot help but wonder now. Why does so much bad happen to such a great guy that is serving God with all he has in him? And an even deeper question that I have is why is it that I make those conclusions in my mind? Why do I think that just because you are good, then only good things will happen to you? I know I need to rethink my logic.
Bad things happen to bad and good people. But for some reason, my head tells me it should not be that way. If you are bad, then bad should happen to you. If you are good, then good should follow close behind. But, I suppose if you look at Christ, he was perfect and was ultimately crucified for it. So, maybe it is just that I think subconsciously followers of Christ should avoid suffering and even not have to go through it, but if anything, the New Testament seems to guarantee the opposite.
So I know i have touched on a few different issues, but these are my random thoughts after a week of praying and pulling for a friend, spiritual brother, and fellow ecclesiastical professional who may not walk again. Keep praying for Josh and check out his progress at www.greenhouseministries.org

More Ultrasound Pics

I am sorry but I just have to...I am simply soooo excited that I wanted to post more of them!

It WILL BE a Girl!

Ok it is official! Come June 2nd, we will be having a girl! Ahhhhhh! Ok I have to admit, I was really hoping for a boy first. But, I know I will just love my girl to death when she comes. Two of my high school friends both had girls first and they simply cannot be torn from them. I am just glad all is ok and the baby is healthy and strong so far. Her ultrasound was amazing as she was moving around and even sticking her fingers in her mouth. Shannon says she will be a little cheerleader like her. I just hope I will be the best Dad for her and I want her to have the best for sure.
God knows what He is doing giving me a girl first, so I must trust him and allow Him to work everything out to His glory. But it is just crazy for me to think that Shannon is already 20 weeks along, thus halfway already...well pray for us over the next 20 weeks if you think of it...I am sure those weeks will fly by quickly.